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Do We Need Conflict Resolution or Reconciliation? Could the Answer Be 'Both'?

Updated: Mar 29

What is the difference between conflict resolution and reconciliation?

Conflict Resolution vs Reconciliation - Lesson 1 - Remember Whose You Are, p. 17

Conflict resolution and reconciliation are two distinct processes that address different aspects of a disagreement or discord. In conflict resolution, we tackle the material or substantive issues at the heart of the conflict. These issues often involve tangible elements such as money, property, roles, or structures. To resolve these conflicts, we identify the specific problems that need to be solved and engage in negotiations with the other person to find mutually acceptable solutions. For instance, if two business partners are in conflict over profit sharing, they might sit down to discuss and agree on a fair distribution method that satisfies both parties.


On the other hand, reconciliation focuses on restoring the relationship by addressing the relational or personal issues of the conflict. This process involves dealing with elements such as hurtful words and actions, gossip, avoidance, and denial. Reconciliation goes beyond merely solving the surface issues; it delves into the emotional and personal aspects that have been damaged. Relational issues are reconciled through confession and forgiveness. For example, if a friend has wronged another through betrayal, reconciliation would involve the offending party admitting their wrongdoing and seeking forgiveness, while the offended party extends grace and forgiveness in return. As Matthew 6:14 (ESV) reminds us, "For if you forgive others their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you."


Both conflict resolution and reconciliation are essential for healthy relationships, but they serve different purposes. While conflict resolution aims to address and solve the specific problems at hand, reconciliation seeks to heal and restore the relationship itself. It is important to recognize when each process is needed and to be willing to engage in both for the sake of harmony and peace.


The Gospel assures us of the ultimate reconciliation achieved through Jesus Christ. As 2 Corinthians 5:18-19 (ESV) states, "All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them, and entrusting to us the message of reconciliation." Through Christ, we are reconciled to God, and we are called to extend that same reconciliation to others. In times of conflict, let us remember the grace we have received and strive to resolve conflicts and reconcile relationships, reflecting the love and forgiveness we have in Christ.



 

This blog series is adapted from Conflict Resolution vs Reconciliation. You can experience this teaching in several ways:


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