Guidelines for Confession
Conflict Resolution vs Reconciliation - Lesson 4, Question 25, p. 64
Confessing sins is an integral part of a believer's walk with Christ. It involves acknowledging wrongdoing and seeking forgiveness and is crucial for building Christian community. But what happens when the person to whom you are confessing is not a Christian? Should this alter the approach to confession?
The answer is nuanced. While the fundamental principles of confession remain unchanged, the way in which a believer confesses to a non-Christian might require some thoughtful adjustments.
Whether or not the other person is a Christian, the believer is called to the same responsibilities in confession. The Guidelines for Confession still apply, although one might be careful how they identify sins according to the Bible, using more general references rather than specific Bible verses. However, the one confessing should not expect an unbelieving person to respond with forgiveness. How can a nonbeliever forgive as God has forgiven them? Confessing sin to a nonbeliever in this way may be so different from what the nonbeliever has experienced that they may ask the one confessing about that kind of response. This gives the believer an opportunity to give reason for the hope they have in Christ. “Keep your conduct among the Gentiles honorable, so that when they speak against you as evildoers, they may see your good deeds and glorify God on the day of visitation.” (1 Peter 2:12).
One practical approach is to avoid overly religious terminology. Instead of citing specific Bible verses, one might explain their actions and remorse in more universal terms. This does not mean diluting the essence of the confession but rather making it comprehensible to someone who may not share the same faith background.
Furthermore, it's vital to manage expectations. A nonbeliever may not understand or offer forgiveness in the same way a fellow Christian might. This is where the opportunity arises for the believer to share about their faith. A genuine confession, coupled with humility, can spark curiosity in the nonbeliever, leading them to inquire about the reasoning behind such an act. It opens the door for a meaningful discussion about the hope and forgiveness found in Christ.
Confessing sins to a nonbeliever requires sensitivity and wisdom. It is about maintaining the integrity of one's faith while communicating in a way that resonates with the other person. As 1 Peter 3:15 encourages, "but in your hearts honor Christ the Lord as holy, always being prepared to make a defense to anyone who asks you for a reason for the hope that is in you; yet do it with gentleness and respect." This approach not only fulfills the call to confession but also exemplifies the love and grace of Christ to those who may not yet know Him.
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